It was at my Leaving Do last week (Well, one of them. The one at the Jalori. “How nice. Acclimatisation?”said I. “Sphincter Conditioning” came the retort.) when conversation turned to the nature of my travels. The real raison d’être, the sitting on my arse watching cricket bit.

“But surely, you can just sit at home watching it on the sofa instead. What’s the point going all that way?” At stumps on Day Two of the first England v India Test Match, I found myself wholly concurring with that statement.

But then after a soothing pot of Masala Chai (Hello Ravi! Hello Kamal!) I came to my senses. You don’t follow your team anywhere and expect to do well, well, I don’t. It’s everything that goes with it.

One of my most chastening moments as a Hatters fan, and this as an impressionable, gawky teenager, was a 7-1 drubbing at the hands of Grimsby. We were terrible. Really bad. And it was cold. Bitter. And on certain days, when the wind is in the wrong direction, I swear I can still smell the disused haddock.
Yet on the way home, the detour to the fish & chip shop proved inspirational. Those fish & chips were probably the best I’ve ever tasted. It didn’t take away the bitter taste of defeat (that seems to be inbuilt in my taste buds ever since coming second in the egg & spoon race at lower school) but it certainly took the edge off it.

My fish and chips moment today came courtesy of my companions Peter & Toni. Peter’s mindless optimism and Toni’s deferential cheer. From RTW Tony and In The Know Toby (He’s found beer in Ahmedabad….) and their accompanying me in the Swanny chant. From Paul & Hannah, a delightful young couple who escape this morass of a match to head to Kerala. From hotel-mate Andy and his Northern stoicism. From Rohan, the helpful tuk-tuk co-driver and cricket student (Tonight’s homework; Which international team does Geraint Jones currently play for?).

To be here. The bigger picture.

Yes, England have made a right ol’ mess of this so far. Yes, I’ve come a long ol’ way to see this right ol’ mess.
However…. It’s not quite 7-1 at Grimsby yet.

Probably ‘4-1 at home to Portsmouth, despite leading, on my birthday, I was violently sick the next day after eating dodgy prawns’ territory but there is still hope.*

So, absolutely. I’m loving this. I’d much rather be here at the sharp end than on my sofa. And I’m definitely looking forward to tomorrow and The Miracle of Motera…..

*Yes, yes. I know, it’s the hope that kills us. Hello Welsh Andy!

1st Day, 1st Test, Motera, Ahmedabad, India vs England

Tuk-tuking to the ground, two signs resonated as we chugged along the Ahmedabad backstreets. Firstly a melancholic daub on a decaying wall, The Youth Alliance vs Corruption, then further on a tired, more official exhibit marking the headquarters of The Gujurati Board of Pollution Control.
I wondered who had the more insurmountable task ahead of them.
Then I saw Virender Sehwag help give his team a massive lead at lunch on the first day and a more intimidating challenge than the two statements from my journey earlier confronted England’s new skipper Alastair Cook.
Sehwag’s innings, a mighty run a ball 117, was an innings typical of the man. It gives me great pleasure to write that because it’s been too long since we saw an innings of bullying brilliance from him. Sadly for England’s bowlers they were on the receiving end of this potentially match defining knock. Yet they did not help themselves. The bowling was too short, too wide. The fielding indolent. If ever a side need a route back into winning ways it is the home team and first Sehwag, then Cheteshwar Pujara benefitted from England’s malaise.
If Sehwag was the shot gun wielding hit man then Pujara proved to be India’s silent assassin. He stealthily compiled his runs, turning England’s attack over and delighting the locals with some delightful stroke play. The heir apparent to the recently retired Dravid, the young Gujurati looks to have the temperament and touch to be The Wall’s long term replacement, he ended the day two short of what promises to be an special century on his return to Test cricket.
Also making his return to the longer format of the game was Yuvraj Singh, the cheers that greeted his arrival eclipsed those even of Sachin Tendulkar, for a change. This popular cricketer finished on 24 and his every run was enthusiastically heralded by the swelling crowd. Singh’s recovery from cancer is one of the game’s more uplifting stories and surely no one could begrudge him a century on comeback….
Doing his best to stop him, and someone sadly and pertinently all too familiar with the workings of a hospital recently is Graeme Swann. Swann’s efforts with the ball was the only real high point for England and but for some sluggish catching from Jonathan Trott, who’s ill considered appeal compounded his error, the Notts bowler would have ended the first day with five wickets. Swann will have to contend himself with the title of being his country’s leading off spinner, his haul today taking him past Jim Laker’s tally of 193, for now.
England ended the day better than they started it, credit to Cook for finding some much needed fight among his team, and will look to the new ball and the fired-up Swann as a way of getting back into the match. Something they’ll need to do quickly if they are to get back in this match and ahead in the series. Otherwise, there’s a job going sorting out pollution or corruption in Gujurat to anyone who feels brave enough.

The BCCI are doing their damnedest to appear the most loathsome and odious governing board in world sport* and their clampdown on photography in the ground is the latest example of this. However, exclusively for DWC readers, here are some pictures of today’s action from inside the Sardar Patel Stadium, session-by-session. Enjoy.

Does anyone have a number for Jocelyn Goldsworthy? Or that bloke who does those natty sketches from the High Court? Or Leonardo Acropolis? They could make a fortune out here….

*Five days before I can start slamming certain hierarchies in other walks of life. You know who you are.