Nagpur. Unforgettably forgettable. Not warranting a whole page to itself in the Rough Guide, home to two million people and famous as the orange capital of India.

Oranges. Orange juice. A glass of locally produced, Vitamin C enriched, fresher than a dip in the Ouse on Christmas morning jus d’orange.
What a wonderful start to the day, the first day of the fourth and final Airtel Test Match.
I’ll just reach for the Room Service Menu….

Now then; Mineral Water, yep, Fruit Punch, non-alcoholic you’d imagine, Mango Shake, hmmm ok, Pineapple Shake, obviously, Strawberry Shake, uh-huh, I think I know what’s coming here, Juice-Tinned, riiiiiiiiiiiiggggghhhhtttt. Lemon Tea? Oh for Goodness sake….

Hang on a minute this is turning in to the Maharastrian version of the Cheese Shop Sketch.

No orange juice. In Nagpur. The orange capital of India. Really?

I’ll settle for an Immodium and a slice of Ma Wiss’s Christmas Cake instead, then (Thanks Mum! Xx Thanks for bringing it out Pete. Top man).

Let us hope England’s day bears more fruit.